A group of country neighbors wanted to get together on a regular basis and socialize.
As a result, about 10 couples formed a dinner club
neighbors' house each month.
Of course, the lady of the house was to prepare the meal.
When it came time for Dick and Jane Brown to
have the dinner at their house,
like most women, Jane wanted to out do all the others
and prepare a meal that was the best that any of them
had ever lapped a lip over.
A few days before the big event,
Jane got out hercookbook and decided
to have mushroom smothered steak.
When she went to the store to buy some mushrooms,
she found the price for a small can was more than
she wanted to pay.
She then told her husband,
"We aren't going to have mushrooms
because they are too expensive."
He said, "Why don't you go down
in the pasture and pick some of those mushrooms?
There are plenty of them right in the creek bed."
She said,"No, I don't want to do that,
because I have heard that wild mushrooms are poison."
He then said, "Idon't think so.
I see the varmints eating them all
the time and it never has affected them."
After thinking about this, Jane decided
to give this a try and got in the pickup
and went down in the pasture and picked some.
She brought the wild mushrooms back home
and washed them, sliced and diced them
to get them ready to go over her smothered steak.
Then she went out on the back porch
and got Ol' Spot's (the yard dog)
bowl and gave him a double handful.
She even put some bacon grease
on them to make them tasty.
Ol' Spot didn't slow down
until he had eaten every bite.
All morning long,
Jane watched him and the wild mushrooms didn't seem to affect him,
so she decided to use them.
The meal was a great success, and Jane even hired a lady from town
to come out and help her serve.
She had on a white apron and a little cap on her head.
It was first class. After everyone had finished,
they all began to kickback and relax and socialize.
The men were visiting and the women started to gossip a bit.
came in from the kitchen and whispered in Jane's ear.
She said,"Mrs. Brown, Spot just died."
With this news, Jane went into hysterics.
After she finally calmed down, she called the doctor and told
him what had happened.
The doctor said, "It's bad, but I think we can take care of it.
I will call for an ambulance and
I will be there as quick as I can get there.
We'll give everyone enemas and
we will pump out everyone's stomach.
Everything will be fine.
Just keep them all there and keep them calm.
"It wasn't long until they could hear the wail
of the siren as the ambulance was coming.
When they got there, the EMTs got out with their suitcases,
syringes, and a stomach pump.
The doctor arrived shortly there after.
One by one, they took each person into
the master bathroom, gave them an enema
and pumped out their stomach.
After the last one was finished,
the doctor came outand said,
"I think everything will be fine now,
and he left."
They were all looking pretty peaked
sitting around the living room,
and about this time,
the town lady came in and said,
"You know, that fellow that ran over
Ol' Spot never even stopped!!